Deep Rising

At this same time last year—probably this very week—number one at the box office was a now-forgotten thriller about a killer snake. Flash forward to this year, and audiences can get scared by a soon-to-be-forgotten thriller about an underwater sea monster. Hmm… movie cliche #1, check.

“Deep Rising” is no-brainer, cut-and-paste, no-frills bottom of the bucket—never mind bottom of the ocean. Good guy captain (Treat William) and his Gilligan-minded assistant (Kevin J. O'Connor) are under siege from the bad guys (led by Wed Studi). Movie cliche #2, check. The bad guys slipped some nuclear missiles on board—movie cliche #3, check—as their little boat approaches a big luxury liner. Movie cliche #4 (especially given you-know-what), check.

That big luxury liner is deserted, except for the weasel captain (Anthony Heald) and a sophisticated pickpocket (Famke Janssen). Movie cliche #5, check. The bad guys continue to walk around, and get killed off by the sea monsters one by one. Movie cliche #6, check. Their machine guns have an unlimited supply of ammo. Movie cliche #7, check.

Bad special effects? Movie cliche #8, check.

Gore that’s not scary? Movie cliche #9, check.

Non-suspenseful music? Movie cliche #10, check.

And, too much profanity? Movie cliche #11, check.

What you see is what you get. Best bet would be skip this and rent the PG-13 rated “Anaconda” from 1997, or the original “Alien” (which is easily PG-13 by 1998’s standards). Both of those had more coherent plots and certainly better scripts.

From a Christian perspective, this is trash. There’s too much profanity, which is often evidence of poorly-written screenplay. Except for Kevin J. O'Connor providing minimal comic relief, all the actors look bored. You can just see the “I’m calling my agent first thing in the morning” look in their faces.

“Deep Rising” is rated R for too much profanity, too much violence, and few instances of blood and gore. PARENTS: Not even children would find this trash entertaining. Not recommended.