Personal Stories from those affected by sexual sin
The Plague of Man
—by Ryan, age 21
Well it is crazy to be writing this but it is for the greater good. You see when I was 12 I began to explore sexually and soon after I became addicted to the plague of man—“masturbation.” So at this time I wasn’t saved and so I could practice without guilt. From what I had heard everything was natural about it. So for the next 5 years it progressed from there and pornography got added into the equation. Of course as you age the need grows stronger.
When I started high school it became a full fledged habit partaking 3-5 times a day. Then I started going to church and my Christian friend told me that the only thing wrong about masturbation is feeling guilty. Of course he was back-slidden but I took him for his word. Then once I got saved I realized the truth about my sin and no longer wanted to do it. And then the true battle began. After many years of viewing pornography and masturbating I was addicted.
But there has been times of hope like when I moved to New Mexico. For one whole year I abstained from “the act.” But after that year I came into major struggles because of depression. Even now I struggle with “the act”. But you know the Lord has taught me much in the fight against this addiction.
All you guys out there the fight goes on daily and it will be a constant fight. But be encouraged to know you are not bound to this. I was addicted and now I can usually go a month or two without falling. Also, men, we can talk about all the ways to fight this addiction, but until we apply ourselves to fight this we will always be bound.
What did Jesus say to the sin of the prostitute? Did he say “stay there” or “Get up and sin no more.” Guys, I encourage you to get up and sin no more!
Follow-up Posting (three months later)
I would like to write about the victory that God has given me in this area of struggling. It was a little over a month ago that God called me on the carpet and created a spiritual revival in my life. I believe it had come to the point where I was doing things to inflict pain and my left hand as if to disable it. I tried to slice it open, of course with no effect. And I scraped it up with guitar strings and even tried placing it on a hot burner. Then finally I tried again to give it up and the enemy led a full-fledged attack on my flesh for 8 whole days. I finally broke because of the constant wrestling and lack of sleep. Then finally God lit a fire in me to increase my studying to twice a day coupled with an hour of prayer.
It became a constant discipline along with holding my conscience and subconscience thoughts captive. I began going into intense times of talking with the Lord and asking for his provision to keep my mind and quiet the urge.
I have struggled with masturbation my whole life and when I became a Christian I didn’t know what to do as I found how defiling and unrighteous the behavior was. Christian—let go of your life and give every spare room in your life up to God and prepare to fight every day.
A lot of things activate our sexual drives. Like TV shows and magazine articles and things that our friends say. We need to come to a point in realizing that if this brings us into sin then this is a front of the enemy—a beachhead in his war to get us to turn away from God.
You do not have the strength within yourself. God is a consuming fire. All you have to do is reach for him and ask for the escape route. Abstain for all substances or material that will cause you to sin. You are called to move past the childish habits and God is faithful to provide for you the victory. You just have to hunger and pray for it. That is to live a holy and pleasing life to the Lord; to be one who might be found faithful.