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Man throwing away videos. Illustration copyrighted.

Planted Seeds

—by an Anonymous Male, age 19

I remember my first encounter with pornography. My friend from next door had got a Penthouse magazine from a kid from school and showed me it. At the time I didn’t feel any draw to it but it was planted there. A seed in my brain that over time would grow. It was watered by t.v, music and just hanging out with the boys when I first got my own magazine.

My mates and I thought it was great and we got more magazines. But that wasn’t enough and when my family got the Internet I found a free way to feed my lust. Then one day I accidentally found some of my fathers porno videos. Well I couldn’t wait. So as soon as I had the chance to I started to watch and recorded them so I had my own copy.

Then my friend invited me along to a camp and I got saved. Immediately I got rid of all my tapes and magazines. But all the time the seeds were planted. Slowly they started to grow back like weeds. Firstly fueled by masturbation, which quickly became boring needed something more.

The Internet once again called and all the time no one knew. I was on the outside a good Christian guy but on the inside I felt so dirty. Quickly my obsession grew stronger until one Sunday a visiting pastor spoke a message right to my heart.

I gave my life back to the Lord and now know the victory of Jesus in my life. Unlike the first time when the excitement of knowing Christ for the first time was enough to stop the urge temporarily, I now know the victory in his blood and name. I have been feeling the best I have ever had and it is great to know the liberty God will give us when we swallow are pride and give it over to him.

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