Semi-Pro

There is no dispute that Will Ferrell is a hilarious, talented actor. Along the way, he has made charming movies such as “Elf” and “Stranger than Fiction.” He has also shown his writing abilities when he teamed up with Adam McKay and created “Anchorman” and “Talladega Nights.” Both movies had objectionable content, but they still contained funny parts to be enjoyed. In his latest movie, “Semi-Pro,” Ferrell did not write the screenplay; he just lent his talent and his name. Those wanting to see this new film because of Ferrell’s past movies should be forewarned. This movie does not have any Ferrell humor or any good humor at all. In its place is an utterly vulgar, filthy movie.

It’s 1976. Will Ferrell plays Jackie Moon, a one-hit wonder that once had fame for his song “Love me Sexy.” After the success of the song, Jackie Moon now owns the Flint Tropics in the ABA basketball league. His stadium is nearly empty, with a few devoted fans. He, however, doesn’t seem to mind. He loves his team and being a leader. Once a rumor of a merger between the ABA and the NBA start circulating, Moon becomes excited that he and his team will finally be a professional basketball team.

The meeting doesn’t go well for Jackie and several other ABA team owners. Yes, there will be a merger, however, only 4 teams will be accepted by the NBA, the rest of the ABA teams will be dissolved; predictably, Moon’s horrible team is not one of the four. After throwing a fit, Jackie and a few other owners convince the commissioner that the best four teams by the end of the season should be selected. Trying to improve his team, Moon trades the team’s washing machine for Monix (Woody Harrelson). With a new member, Moon feels he finally has a chance to win a spot on the top 4 list.

The plot of this movie was very thin. I summed up almost the entire movie in the above paragraphs. The characters in the movie were shallow and annoying at times. Warm moments were attempted, but were unfruitful. I believe the best performance was by Andre Benjamin who plays Clarence “Coffee” Black. He convincingly delivers his lines. However, he could not save the film; the script is not funny. Instead of trying to find true humor, the writer just filled it with crudeness, hoping someone would eventually laugh. The theatre I sat in remained mostly silent throughout the entire movie.

Moral Content

From beginning to end, the movie has extreme vulgarity and sexual references. Several scenes would carry on the filthy jokes, making sure the audience did not miss it. I gladly would have walked out if I had not been writing a review.

• Even before the movie begins, the audience hears Jackie’s one-hit wonder “Love me Sexy.” It talks about being naked and performing oral sex. In the opening sequence, the album covered is shown, and Moon’s head is in-between a woman’s legs.

• I counted over 81 uses of profanity, including at least 22 f-words, 25 s__t. The characters are almost always cursing each other out.

• The Lord’s name is also said in vain at least 7 times. In addition, I counted at least 7 GDs.

• Male anatomy was referred to in abundance—c__k and d__k. They would often freely insult each other using these terms in derogatory ways. With female anatomy, they used the disgusting p-word. They would say that they would be getting some of it, or they would call each other by the name. I would bet they said these at least 20 times.

• Oral sex was frequently discussed. The players said they wish they could keep an oral sex act after all the games.

• There is also a graphic sex scene. No nudity is shown, however, the noise is loud and the female is shown on top of the male. When her boyfriend walks in on her, witnessing her infidelity, shockingly, he smiles and begins to perform an act on himself.

• In the first few minutes, the cheerleaders are wearing almost nothing. The sports broadcasters talk about “boobs,” their different sizes, and their preferences.

• Porn is almost glorified in this movie. One mentioned that porn saved them, and watching porno means “you’re not getting laid.”

• There is a lengthy scene where some of the characters are playing with an assumed empty gun. They kept pulling the trigger and laughing. It eventually did shoot someone, and they all just laughed, even the victim.

There was much more offense in this movie. I urge Christians to skip this filth. This movie was not funny. There are other cleaner movies that are actually humorous. Paul wrote that the body is not made for sexual immorality, but for the Lord. This movie dangerously teaches the complete opposite. I offended the Holy Spirit living inside me. My bottom-line advice is to stay away from this movie.

Violence: Moderate / Profanity: Heavy / Sex/Nudity: Heavy

See list of Relevant Issues—questions-and-answers.