Final Destination: Bloodlines

“Happy Death Day to you! Happy Death Day to you! Happy Death Day, Happy Death Day, Happy Death Day to you!”

Wait, that’s not how that song goes! Well when you’re the Campbell family, death is the one thing the family really likes to talk about, sort of (shoot maybe they even sing about it). But I’m getting ahead of myself…

Ever since dear old Iris Campbell and her boyfriend (turned husband later) had dinner together at the Skyview Tower (a 494 tall tower, similar to Seattle’s Space Needle), nothing has ever been the same. When Iris and her fiance Paul start to dance with the rest of the crowd at the Skyview, Iris has a premonition: the Tower is going to come apart and people are going to fall to their VERY gruesome deaths. Of course, she does everything she can to save all the people on the tower. As one character states, “Death doesn’t like it when you mess with his plans.”

That was around the 1960s. Flash forward to the present, Iris has had children and grandchildren (probably even great grandchildren) and has gone on to live a very, uh, secluded and paranoid life. Ever since that premonition, Iris has sheltered herself in a fortified home out in the middle of nowhere. The rest of the family, however, has gone on to living normal lives. Well most of them did.

Stefani Reyes, one of Iris’ grandchildren, has not been able to sleep well. She has been experiencing Iris’ premonition in her dreams, over and over again, watching people in the Tower fall to their gruesome deaths instead of what actually happened. “Why does this keep happening? I’m failing my college classes and I’m on academic probation all because of these stupid dreams!” Her friend suggests she go seek out her grandmother and get some answers.

In time, Stefani is able to find Iris. Iris warns her that while her premonition did allow for hundreds of lives to be saved, there was a cost. Instead of Iris dying, Death came for her husband first. Iris became so obsessed she started seeing death everywhere in every little action, again, leading her to lock herself away in her secluded home. “Read this book, it’ll tell you everything I’ve learned about Death and how to avoid Death,” she warns Stefani. Stefani at first thinks Iris has lost her mind, until Iris is killed the second she walks outside.

Stefani then realizes Iris was right and pleads with the rest of the family to be extremely cautious, as she states that their entire family was never supposed to exist. The rest of her family (aunt, uncle, cousins and even her brother) thinks she is nuts. But, as other family members begin to die, things start to make more sense to the rest of the family. Now the question is “how long can the family cheat death?”

After 20 plus years and 6 films, the “Final Destination” film comes full circle, with it’s final film “Final Destination: Bloodlines.” Each Final Destination film upped the ante, asking moviegoers, “How graphic do you want it to be?’ Regardless of whether this is the right question to ask, gore movie fans cried out “As graphic and disturbing as you can make it.” “Okay, you got it!” said the filmmakers

The very first Final Destination film started out with, yes, people dying but the graphic nature of each death wasn’t nearly as extreme as it has become now (a plane crash, a roller coaster accident). I mean the early 2000s were a different time, there was gory and graphic violence that even Hollywood couldn’t get away with back then. Two decades later, Hollywood has released all the restraints that were on violence. “More graphic, more disturbing” the fans continue to cry out.

Five films later, we are presented with “… Bloodlines.” While I can appreciate that there is an actual story with this one (and a film that has some decent performances), what I can’t fathom is why in the world would anyone want to lose their lunch while watching the movie? Maybe I’m speaking for myself but the film was so nauseating that I thought I was going to throw up at times…

The violence is so grotesque, so over the top that even those with stronger stomachs than I would turn away from the characters’ impending deaths. Some characters are skewered like shish kabobs, some are crushed by a garbage truck, and some just have their bodies smashed as they fall off a 400 ft tower or be flattened by a baby grand piano. The list is extensive and frankly downright disturbing. I know I shouldn’t be, but I continue to be amazed at how low a film can go, even a gore/horror film (even children are killed in graphic ways here).

Here’s the other thing, I know I have to list the violent content, scene by scene, for this film. Frankly, though, I shudder at the thought of it, as the scenes continue to play on in my head several hours after viewing the film. I will push through, though, as you all deserve to know what’s ahead should you decide you want to give this film a whirl…

NOTE: Descriptions of graphic, violent scenes are ahead. Reader discretion is strongly advised.

Content

VIOLENCE: Extreme. I had over a page of violent content on my clipboard! That’s the most I’ve ever had. Here we go. The first scene is a rather lengthy scene in which A boy drops a penny from a tower and a guard warns him that they could kill a person from that height. A glass floor that everyone dances on in the tower begins to crack and dozens of people fall to their death, hitting the support beams on the outside before splattering as they hit the ground (yes we actually see people splattered on the ground). One character is even skewered in this seen. Three people catch on fire during the chaos. People fall through the side wall of an emergency staircase and fall to their deaths. A glass window breaks with people leaning on it, while a baby grand piano falls on the individuals and then on a child outside of the tower, completely splattering him. Someone’s finger is sliced off. Someone is sliced in half (we see their insides). This was all just ONE scene.

In other scenes, a man is playing Mortal Kombat and a character in the game is seen stabbing someone through the top of their skull. A weathervane falls off a roof and goes right through someone’s face, causing the person’s tissues and jaw to fall off (this is shown twice). Someone almost chokes. Pictures in Iris’ show the various ways each of her family members may die. A flame from a grill ignites and almost burns a character. Glass goes through someone’s foot. A lawnmower rolls over someones head and, uh, “blenders” it (it’s extremely graphic). Someone is seen having their tongue pierced (close up shot).

A character is strung up by a chain on a fan, the character breaks free but not before falling on fire on the ground (he survives). A character is almost hit by two vehicles. Another character is grabbed by a garbage truck by accident and have their head, uh, “compacted” (their head is cut in half and their arm is cut off). A character receives a “nut check” (someone getting hit in the privates). Two boys make a plan to cheat death by causing one character, who is deadly allergic to peanuts, to eat a peanut butter bar. In all this, one of the characters is pulled in by an extremely powerful MRI machine, as is the wheel chair behind him, due to the metal on his body and the wheelchair legs come apart and go right through him. The other boys asphyxiates on the peanut butter bar but not before being drawn into the MRI as well and having a metal item go through his head.

But wait, there’s more! A house explodes (People are badly burned). Someone is crushed by a pole. Two characters almost drown. A train plows through a neighborhood and two characters are killed by falling large logs that are on the train.

VULGARITY: To add insult to injury (literally), there is plenty of vulgar language to go around. F*ck (11), F*cking (1) F*ck off (1), Go F*ck yourself (1) What the F*ck (1), Sh*t (11), an obscene gesture is used, and B*tches (1), S.O.B (1), A** (1), A**hole (1).

PROFANITY: G*d-d*mn (1), G*d-d*mnit (10), J*sus (1) and the words “J*sus f*cking Fenberry,” “Oh my G*d” (1), H*ll (4), H*ly Sh*t (1).

SEXUAL CONTENT: A boy seems to be effeminate (it’s not quite clear but his fingernails are painted). A woman is pregnant out of wedlock. One character finds out their father is not their biological father.

ALCOHOL: People drink at a party and in the Skyview tower scene. A song references pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. Someone drinks while pregnant (this was during the 1960s when the dangers weren’t really understood).

OTHER: A boy steals pennies from a fountain. A thorn pricks someone’s hand and it bleeds (twice). A woman talks to Death. Speaking of which…

OCCULT: Death is made out to be this spiritual being that can think and act independently. Death can plan and even when it’s thwarted, it finds another way to kill characters.

There are no positive redeeming themes to be found in this movie. Sorry.

Final Thoughts

Isn’t it ironic that I’ve written such a lengthy review for something as short and simple as a Final Destination movie? Final Destination films, including “…Bloodlines” have never been about substance (character development, or lack thereof) or redemptive uplifting messages. No, they’re about the disgust, the tastelessness, the absolute lack of discretion and discernment with how much, and how graphic a film becomes.

In case it wasn’t clear enough, no Christian should see “Final Destination: Bloodlines.” You will feel dirty, in body and spirit, after walking out. I sincerely hope this is the last of the Final Destination films, I TRULY do. Do yourself a massive favor and stay clear of this film, and as the late Tony Todd says in the film “live life to the fullest.” In essence, this film is an extremely hard pass.

• Violence: Extreme
• Profane language: Moderate
• Vulgar/Crude language: Very Heavy
• Sex: Mild
• Drugs/Alcohol: Mild
• Occult: Mild
• Nudity: Minor
• Wokeism: Minor

See list of Relevant Issues—questions-and-answers.