Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul

Negative—I lasted 20 minutes. Initially it seemed reasonable because the strength of the “Diary of a Wimpy Kid” series is to express what young teens feel like and how they perceive the world, whether it’s realistic or a little ridiculous. I enjoyed that in the books. But when that crosses into the sort of territory that teaches children new ways to do mischief, lie or be cruel… no thanks. This is far more influential in a film than a book.

I soon became convinced that this film wouldn’t do anyone good, so there was no point in continuing to watch.
My Ratings: Moral rating: Extremely Offensive / Moviemaking quality: 3

Negative—“Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul” was painful for me to sit through. Not just because of the ungodliness and immorality of the characters, but the extreme gross-out humor. Every character is either selfish, rude, or mean-spirited, and every moment not focused on sin made my stomach hurt. I already had an idea I would be grossed out by the movie, so I made sure to not bring any snacks with me. Anything that could be done for godly reasons had ungodly motives or extremism surrounding it. Here are some examples.

The mom wants her children to not simply play on the phones while on the road trip. Fair enough, a fasting from technology to spend time with family is godly and good. However, the mom is clearly portrayed in a fanatic-like mindset over the whole ordeal and it leads to Roderick and Greg trying to steal their phones back behind their mother’s back, which also leads to…

Greg’s father is using his laptop behind the mother’s back, but only for work purposes. Fair enough, using technology only for godly working purposes is allowable. However, he lies to his wife about fasting on the technology when he could have easily explained the truth to her. It’s also implied Greg’s father is lying to his boss about not being on a road trip. Why doesn’t the father explain the road trip to his boss and explain to his wife that he needs to work? That’s a big issue with the film overall; certain characters make their trials and difficulties harder than they need to be and with no humorous payoff or godly lessons learned.

The gross-out humor is ugly. There’s an ugly pacifier for the baby, Greg gets a used diaper stuck to his hands (and adults are filming and laughing at him very meanly with no one offering to help him), someone vomits on a carnival ride, and there’s a mean-spirited stereotypical Southern-like family that lacks a sense of hygiene.

Is there anything godly or funny in this movie? Very little. The only thing that really stood out is Rowley (the most godly character in the other movies and with a sense of humor cleaner than most of the other characters) thanking Greg’s parents for taking him out to eat at a restaurant aimed at younger kids (while Greg and Roderick complain in an attitude of ingratitude). Sadly, Rowley is barely in this movie, though he does show a desire to mind his parents and show respect.

Overall, just skip “Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul.” Mean-spirited for the sake of it one minute, stomach churning the next minute.
My Ratings: Moral rating: Very Offensive / Moviemaking quality: 3

…a bumpy, humor-free ride… a dirge of unfunny scatological material, techno-anxiety and child endangerment masquerading as familial bonding. …

…it still hasn’t figured out how to make its characters as likeable or knowingly engaging as Kinney’s simple line drawings and text. …

…Every single sight gag in “Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul” telegraphs its punchline, for what seems like an eternity. …[2]

…it doesn't do anything new and isn't particularly good. …[2/5]

…a tired story, the family road trip that goes outlandishly awry, and the result is another forgettable film.…

…some of the humor is of a lowbrow peepee/caca type that will have most adults rolling their eyes, there are bits everyone will enjoy, notably a clever “I Confess” car game that Greg uses to give prankster Rodrick a taste of his own medicine. …

…Lacks jokes… this series has lost much of its charm, and possibly a little bit of its soul. [2/4]

…isn't full of laughs… The adults’ acting is crude and clownish. The kid actors are insufferable. … with the three major joke groups — pee, poop and puke — all over-represented. …[1½/5]

…over-the-top-stupid… less fun than a family road trip… [1/5]