Jennifer's Body

The latest installment of the Megan Fox craze is grotesque and uninteresting, at best. Written by Oscar-winner Diablo Cody, noted for her snappy dialogue in “Juno,” and directed by Karyn Kusama (“Girlfight” and “Aeon Flux”), the creative team reeks of potential, yet fails to deliver.

Set in the small, backwoods town of Devil’s Kettle, Anita, A.K.A. “Needy,” played by Amanda Seyfried (“Mama Mia!”) is the victimized friend of the school vixen, Jennifer, played by Megan Fox (“Transformers”). Needy has stayed loyal to Jennifer since their sandbox days, despite Jennifer’s obvious controlling and manipulative manner. When the desperate-to-make-it-big indie band Low Shoulder rolls into town to play at a local bar, Jennifer sets her sights on meeting the lead singer, Nikolai, played by Adam Brody (“The O.C.”). After a fire spreads through the bar, setting several people aflame, Jennifer leaves with the band in their van. Needy finds Jennifer in her kitchen later that night, covered in blood, where she vomits a black fluid later described as “road kill and sewing needles mixed together.”

Rumors of the fire and what happened spread through the town, leaving the residents in shock and despair. Everyone except Jennifer, who arrives at school the day after looking refreshed and full of life, completely insensitive to her classmate’s mourning of death. From there, the movie barely progresses as Jennifer viciously murders boy after boy, with Needy desperately trying to make a connection between the murders and her friend’s strange and terrifying behavior.

I could not recommend this film for anyone from a Biblical perspective and am struggling to find any true value emerging from any sound critical analyses. Had I not been writing a review on the film, I would have walked after about the first couple of scenes. From its tightly framed graphic scenes to its porn-bred innuendo throughout, the mind reels trying to comprehend how this film can be justified as entertainment which is not subversive to the Christian ethic. Even getting into the movie is an uncomfortable situation. “I’d like to see Jennifer’s Body.” Or how about, “Two for Jennifer’s Body, please.” It’s awkward, at best. The previews make the movie seem mild in comparison to the actual 102 minutes spent watching stereotypical characters deliver snarky, forgettable dialogue, while any humorous moments are soon lost in the midst of disrespectful and often times overtly crude remarks.

Jennifer’s character is completely one-dimensional, lacking depth of any kind. It’s as if Cody never bothered to peel back the layers of her character, giving us no reason to care one way or another. Even when watching her ruthlessly and seductively devour the young men of the town, including Needy’s boyfriend, Chip (Johnny Simmons). It seems that her sole role in the film is as mere eye candy, which is shamelessly piled on. Fox shows varying degrees of cleavage throughout. The first time we see her, she is sitting on her bed wearing a very tight t-shirt and short shorts. The first time she is seen in her blood-thirsty state, she pins Needy to a wall and touches Needy’s breast over her shirt, then kisses her on the neck. Just before killing Jonas the school football star whom she has touch her “heart” (actually her chest) and kisses heavily in the woods, she unzips and removes her already revealing sweater, exposing her midsection and shoulders. There is a suggested hand job just before she bites into his neck. Later on she is seen skinny dipping with her entire backside exposed. In another scene, where she kills eats the insides of a boy from her class, she tells him “We can play boyfriend, girlfriend” and “You give me such a wetty.” She is seen silhouetted in a provocative position on top of the boy as she tears at his insides with her mouth, saying “I need you scared. I need you hopeless.” This scene is intercut with Needy and her boyfriend, removing each other’s clothing in a bedroom, kissing heavily, applying a condom under the covers and engaging in what can only be described as intense soft-core pornography.

Just when you think it couldn’t get worse or any more uncomfortable (I was literally squirming in my seat at this point), it does. After having sex, Needy goes home only to find Jennifer in her bed, wearing a small shirt and underwear. Jennifer tells Needy, “We always sleep in your bed when we have slumber parties,” and they begin tongue kissing, eventually laying down together, kissing heavily until Needy gets up. Aside from being offensive, this scene serves no purpose to the plot, and only exists to raise sales amongst male viewers (as if Fox’s presence isn’t good enough already).

Jennifer tells Needy about her encounter with the members of Low Shoulder the night of the fire in flashback form. Inside of the van are many occult objects, such as ritual candles, books on witchcraft and Satanism, a skull, etc. Jennifer recognizes her danger and asks if they are rapists, saying that she’s never had sex, and they should go find someone who has. The band members tie Jennifer up in the woods and begin a Satanic ritual involving a virgin sacrifice that is supposed to make them successful with the lead singer telling the others, “Satan is our only hope.” He reads off a chant and stabs Jennifer repeatedly as she screams, begging him to stop.

Somehow she “lived” through it, becoming an undead, feeding off of human blood. (She is referred to as a demon, though this is clearly along the lines of classic vampire cannon).

Needy kicks Jennifer out after this encounter and does some research on the curse and how to counter it, discovering that the only way to “kill the beast” is by stabbing it in the heart. When she tries to tell her boyfriend what she knows, he, of course, does not believe her.

On his way to the school dance later, Chip is confronted by Jennifer convincing him that Needy was “parking” the last boy that was murdered. Jennifer tongue kisses him against a tree outside, then they make their way to an abandoned pool (where the pool came from, or why it was there is never explained making the situation even less believable), where she tells him to “show me a breast stroke.” Jen attempts to drown Chip in the mucky water. By the time Needy shows up to save him, Jennifer has him pinned against the pool wall, sucking on his bloody neck. Needy jumps in and the girls fight for a few moments. We see a lot of wet cleavage from both girls in this scene. Jennifer tells needy she is going to devour her soul and that she “goes both ways,” referring to killing both boys and girls, but also used a sexual reference.

Needy speaks to her boyfriend as he dies by the pool, deciding then to kill Jennifer for what she has done. Needy jumps through Jennifer’s bedroom window (who is back in her tight shirt and short shorts) with a box cutter. They fight on the bed where Needy cuts Jennifer’s stomach and while levitating, eventually stabbing Jennifer in the heart. Blood is spilled and runs down her neck.

Language: Aside from these grotesque and offensive scenes is the consistent use of profanities of all kinds, even some made up ones. There are at least 22 uses of the “f” word, a few of which are sexual, about 16 “s” words, 15 inappropriate uses of God or Jesus Christ, including “God d*mn,” 5 “a” words, as well as “hell,” the “b” word, and “damn” being scattered throughout. Other offensive language includes variations of the word “t*ts,” Chip calls Nikolai a “d**che bag” twice, Jennifer calling Needy a “freakish gaylord”, a teacher uses the term “ho” referring to students, and Chip’s little sister calls him “penis cheese”. Several made up terms were “freaktarded,” “tragedy boner”, “porking” (meaning intercourse), and “back door virgin” (meaning anal sex). A girl calls Needy “a total lesbi-gay,” Jennifer says, “What’s up, Vagisil?” to Needy and later asks if Chips is “packing some serious pubic inches.”

Spiritual issues: Beyond the film being offensive and intolerable on a basic level, it also hits some on a very spiritual level. In the opening scene, Needy talks about prayer commenting, “I say the words, but nothing happens. No one gets off the cross.” The tense scene in the woods with the members of Low Shoulder sacrificing Jennifer practically glorifies Satanism, making being a blood-thirsty demon look like a cool thing because of the seductive behaviors displayed by Jennifer. She cannot die, heals quickly and can levitate—all things considered “super powers,” at first glance. But when mixed with campy demonization like Evil Dead and a sad attempt at breaking vampire cannon like the “Twilight” series, it settles somewhere between pitiful and obscurely offensive.

This film opens with a monologue about a local waterfall that goes nowhere. This seems to be obvious foreshadowing, unfortunately for the writers it’s prophetic notion is realized several times in the very plot itself. While there were a few brief moments where the film had potential to go somewhere meaningful, it followed the flow of the waterfall and emptied into a pointless pool. Following suit, the widely anticipated “Jennifer’s Body” will simply become an easily forgotten blemish on Megan’s body of work.

Violence: Extreme / Profanity: Heavy / Sex/Nudity: Extreme

See list of Relevant Issues—questions-and-answers.

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