Reviewed by: Thaisha Geiger
CONTRIBUTOR
Moral Rating: | Very Offensive |
Moviemaking Quality: |
|
Primary Audience: | Teens Adults |
Genre: | Sci-Fi Adventure Comedy |
Length: | 1 hr. 33 min. |
Year of Release: | 2009 |
USA Release: |
June 5, 2009 (wide—3,300 theaters) DVD: October 13, 2009 |
Was there a “Big Bang”? Answer
Frequently asked questions about astronomy and the Bible—Go
CAVEMEN—Do they fit with the Bible? Answer
DINOSAUR ORIGIN—Where did the dinosaurs come from? Answer
Are dinosaurs mentioned in the BIBLE? Answer
WHY did God create dinosaurs? Answer
LIVING WITH DINOSAURS—What would it have been like to live with dinosaurs? Answer
FEROCIOUS DINOSAURS—Were the dinosaurs ever really as ferocious as they are shown in books and films? Answer
NOAH’S ARK—Did Noah take dinosaurs on the Ark? Answer
DINOSAURS AFTER THE FLOOD—Following the Flood, what happened to dinosaurs? Answer
GAY—What’s wrong with being gay? Answer
Homosexual behavior versus the Bible: Are people born gay? Does homosexuality harm anyone? Is it anyone’s business? Are homosexual and heterosexual relationships equally valid?
What about gays needs to change? Answer
It may not be what you think.
Featuring |
Will Ferrell Anna Friel Danny McBride Leonard Nimoy Jorma Taccone, John Boylan, Matt Lauer, Bobb'e J. Thompson, Sierra McCormick, Shannon Lemke, Steven Wash Jr., Brian Huskey, Kevin Buitrago, Noah Crawford, Jon Kent Ethridge, Logan Manus, Ben Best, Scott Dorel, Sean Michael Guess, Dennis McNicholas, Chris Henchy, Kurt Carley, Travis Samuel Clark, Daniel George, Todd Christian Hunter, Marti Matulis, Tim Soergel, Douglas Tait, Patrick Wedge, Ana Alexander, Moran Atias, Jesse Golden, Eve Mauro, Pollyanna McIntosh, Ania Spiering, Paul Adelstein, Adam Behr, Daamen J. Krall |
Director |
Brad Silberling — “Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events,” “City of Angels,” “Casper” |
Producer | Mosaic Media Group, Relativity Media, Marty Krofft, Sid Krofft, Jimmy Miller, Joshua Church, Jessica Elbaum, Daniel Lupi, John Swallow, Julie Wixson Darmody |
Distributor |
“Space-time vortexes suck.”
Dr. Rick Marshall (Will Ferrell) became the laughing stock of the science community after losing his cool with Matt Lauer. His theory of parallel dimensions was classified as nonsense by all except for one Cambridge scientist named Holly Cantrell (Anna Friel). Holly encourages Rick to build his invention that would transport them to another dimension and finally restore his name. Transporting to the other dimension is easy, but finding the transporting device and trying to defeat T-Rex prove to be the tricky parts.
“Land of the Lost” aims to be a screwball comedy, and it succeeds. The scenery is so far-fetched and exaggerated, and the acting not even realistically in the realm of truth. However, it works. The beef between Dr. Marshall and T-Rex was very original and comedic, especially how T-Rex apparently understands English. With that in mind, this film had the massive potential to be an utterly charming, hilarious movie. What’s the catch? While “Land of the Lost” is appropriately hysterical in a few scenes, the majority of it is highly and pervasively crude.
So much offense is in this movie that to list everything would take too much space. In short, there are over 50 uses of profanity, and God’s name is profaned over 30 times. Ferrell whispers “f__k you” to the Cha-Ka; the sexually derogative “p__y” and “d__k” are used as well. However, that isn’t the end of it.
The sexual crudeness in the film is also constantly present throughout. From an implied masturbation to women-breast coffee cups for sale, the sexual crudeness is deeply saturated from almost start to finish. Most of the crudeness is aimed at Holly. She’s suggested to sit on top of a vibrating crystal, warned that the tour might make her wet, and has her breasts groped repeatedly. Near the end of the film, almost-naked women are shown whose privates are barely covered by very short grass skirts and long hair. The camera zooms in on their body parts, leaving very little to the imagination.
There are two statements about which I felt need to comment. During one of his battles with T-Rex, Dr. Marshall lights dynamite and asked for it to explode, just as the Big Bang theory exploded. Awesomely, it did not explode. I found this humorous and a factual statement. God and science are perfectly in sync; I encourage anyone to look up the scientific facts in the Bible; an excellent start would be the film “Expelled” and the links provided in this review. God Himself created us, not some random explosion.
Secondly, Dr. Marshall told Cha-Ka that he had more love for him than Jesus did for all the billions He died on the cross for. While I imagine this statement might offend some, I found it to be highly absurd. In Matthew 27, Matthew wrote that after Jesus’ betrayal and arrest, the guards stripped Jesus naked and gave him a thorn crown and scarlet robe, mocking him as a king. The guards then spat on Jesus and kept beating him over his head. All the while, Jesus kept silent and endured the pain, agony, and humiliation for all mankind. Jesus knew he always had an out. During his actual arrest, Peter understandably took his sword out and attempted to defend the Christ. However, Jesus commanded Peter to put his sword away. In Matthew 26:53-54, Jesus said:
“Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and He will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?”
In short, Jesus knew this death on the cross as a sacrifice for all was the only way. Whenever I read this Scripture, I wonder if I could have silently endured the torture, knowing how so many people nowadays misuse the name of Christ or make jokes at His expense. It is at those times, I realize, that we can all make His sacrifice worthy by our actions, living for Him, and completely obeying His commandments.
While there were some clean laugh-out-loud moments, they didn’t feel safe. Barely did they finish when crudeness was thrown in yet again, making me wonder if I laughed at anything potentially sinful. I recommend avoiding this film like the plague. King Solomon wisely wrote in Proverbs 4:23, “above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” It’s so easy to let down one’s guard for the sake of a laugh. Would wise guards voluntarily stand in front of an impending, yet completely avoidable battle? No! Likewise, we should wisely stay away and not fight unnecessary battles of sin.
Violence: Moderate / Profanity: Heavy / Sex/Nudity: Heavy
See list of Relevant Issues—questions-and-answers.
My Ratings: Moral rating: Better than Average / Moviemaking quality: 4